Susie, I hope things have quieted down in the past few days. (Just now catching up on all of my Substack reading.) Sending you healing thoughts... to remedy the scarcity of sleep, to relieve the effects of garden work, and to clear your environment. May the mice saunter softly above you.
Oh, and we keep our little eight-legged friends in the corners and say they are preparing our decorations for Halloween. (They also kill mosquitoes once in a while.)
Thank you Louise, the air is clear now, though I shudder to think of the residual effects of such a fire… probably its best not to!
I have handed out tiny slippers to the mice which seems to be working, for the moment anyway and the spiders, well, as you say they may decorate my kitchen (mostly rather beautifully) in place I’d rather they didn’t but they do kill the odd even more unwanted guest!
Oh, those dear little mice. I can just picture them shuffling about in the attic, all snug in their little slippers. 🐀 Not a creature was stirring.... Well, actually, they were, but you just couldn't hear them!
Oh Susie, insomnia is so horrid and then add to that the acrid air, an the pressure you put on yourself to make it all grand… I want wrap a blanket around you and turn off time so your body can find its rhythm again. My friend just shared this essay she wrote about her insomnia, I think you might find some solidarity in the read/listen.
Thank you for the link Kimberly, I have added it to my list to listen to later as I complete the horrifying list of mundanities necessary before classes again on Monday.
Insomnia has crept up on me slowly, as a young woman it was a rare and ultimately forgettable occurrence, as a middle-aged/now-knocking-old-aged woman it feels like I’ve stepped onto unknown path and can’t find my way to the right one. I have tried to find a common denominator, there isn’t one, I have tried eating different foods, cutting out all connectivity an hour before sleeping, windows open, windows closed, I’ve moved my bed, changed pillows, tried yoga… nothing seems to deter those nights of open eyed restlessness that arrive on a whim and wisp unannounced and certainly unwanted…
I am unfortunately my own worst enemy though. Joining hands with insomnia is hyperactivity, I am so aware of a need to stay healthy as I get older, the need to keep moving is now an obsession… so much so I become overtired which has the exact opposing effect I am searching for. I know this, I know eventually it will end too, that the cost will be high… probably the highest possible.
Sadly it is also a product of a difficult life, one that I cannot change… I cling to my quiet moments as if they are a life line and hope at least that that line is strong.
I think, as someone interested in the lives of others, writing about my own seems fair and honest. It is not always easy, in fact sometimes an almost impossibility - like sharing our soul with the world and not knowing who cares and who doesn’t ever could be plain sailing! 🫣
Warm thanks Dave, I really appreciate you taking the time to read my ramblings here. I’m delighted you enjoy them. My back is ok, if I’m careful… and despite the insomnia and the toxic waste, I had a very lovely weekend with Rosie. Sending hugs xx
I will not scold you for the enormous tasks you pile upon yourself, let others do it for a change, I've tried to no avail...lol! Thank God for Rosie's well timed visit this past weekend considering the disastrous burning of 900 tonnes of lithium batteries and several nights of deprived sleep. She is medicine for your soul, as you are mine. Love n Light always sweet Susie. Sweet dreams!
If only your scoldings worked darling… perhaps the sleeplessness would never happen? I am convinced there is a link between my over/hyper activity and those nights I lay wide awake, my head filled with everything and anything guaranteed to not let my eyes close. I’m going to research some deep breathing exercises (as if I don’t do enough already!😂 but know not that sort…)
Sending love sweet soul, love and light always ♥️xxx
Oh dear, Susie - slightly less pressure on the accelerator seems to be called for! I also don't sleep well if I have overly exerted during the day. And as for those spiders' webs....I just call them my natural art installations 😉🙃
Haha, I love that Lynn, “natural art installations’ 😂I will tell this to my husband the next time there is a cobweb dangling from the beams above our kitchen table!
Yes! Foot off the accelerator… it’s good advice, but how the devil do I do that? How do you do that? When ever I try it feels like I’m playing devils advocate! X
I learned to slow up the hard way - I burned out and got dangerously close to a nervous breakdown. These days I listen to my body; it's very good at communicating if you open up to listening to it. Nothing is more important than your health; you can't function without it. Who wants their epitaph to be 'She had a clean house and a tidy garden'?
Gorgeous writing; what prodigious energy - too much 'doing' perhaps causing the insomnia (but so elegantly described - I shall share that paragraph in my restack). And then the generous mention of our musings and gatherings. A thousand thanks. So glad you had Rosie for company during the strangest of weekends. Manmade toxicity ... enough said!
Too much ‘doing’ has been a life long malady, I want to do it all, experience everything life throws in my path… the wonderful curiosities of this world, albeit my small corner, never cease, there is always a little something new and exciting catching my eye which simply can’t be ignored! I need to remember though, ‘curiosity killed the cat’!
I don’t even want to think of the pollution caused by the fire which is still burning, I am praying the wind doesn’t change before it goes out, we were some of the lucky ones!
You’re so very welcome for the shout out, you’re website is beautiful, filled with curiosities! 😂
Oh Susie, you drive yourself so hard! Please take my ‘do as I say, not as I do’ advice and put rest higher up your to do list. Even if it leaves thistles standing. In my experience there is something about physical exhaustion that ridiculously induces insomnia. Makes no sense at all!
I hope you had a lovely time with Rosie nonetheless and find time to rest a little this week. Xx
I am my own worst enemy Vanessa, inherited from my dear Papa, I am incapable of slowing down until I hit the proverbial brick wall. Insomnia does seem to be the result of over exertion, something I find hard to accept, you are quite right when you say this!
Thank you for kind words, I do slow down, sadly only when forced to though… I never learn!
Regardless of the very bizarre weekend though, Rosie and I passed a lovely weekend together… we always do ! X
Oh Susie I'm chronically driven and chronically insomniac too – the two things must be connected, I'm certain - but your post, while inspiringly written and as lively as ever, made me feel exhausted! (Distressed about the lithium, too.) Oh and all gardens worth the name must look like that in winter.
Pleased though that you had Rosie home.
No doubt EVERYONE is giving you sleep cures (I loved the Nabokov quote and that's JUST how it is!), but for sure, I'm better with no screens at all after about 6 (she says at 8pm), some tilleul tea, Arkorelax Flash Sommeil melatonin spray under the tongue at bedtime (from the chemist), and a roll-on of relaxing essential oils.
I also repeat the mantra 'quiet mind, quiet heart' until I'm so bored with it that – on occasion – I actually do fall asleep. On the other hand, if you find a cure, do let me know!
I’m trying not to think of the fire, the Lithium poisoning the valley, we have been told there is no danger and yet as I read in, we are advised to wash everything that was left outside… as I said we are outside of the danger zone (Samll mercy) but Lithium…! 😓
Hi Roselle, apologies for the delay in replying, I prefer to not rush replies and as such have to wait for a few moments of liberty to do so. I am also convinced that being driven to permanently ‘do’ is linked to insomnia also.
I truly am my own worst enemy, I simply can’t leave something that needs to be tended to, no matter that I’m already dragging my weary body around. But surely there must be other factors playing their role? I have tried to find a common denominator, there isn’t one, I have tried eating different foods, cutting out all connectivity an hour before sleeping, windows open, windows closed, I’ve moved my bed, changed pillows, tried yoga and meditation (impossible for a Gemini mind) nothing seems to deter those nights of open eyed restlessness that arrive on a whim and wisp unannounced and certainly unwanted…
Thank you for the sleep cures… indeed you’re right, I have tried almost everything. Though not the Arkorelax spray. Which I will order immediately… Aromatherapy oils worked well for a while but I think our bodies grow a certain resistance to them, as mine has to Valerian and Passiflore… havé no fear though, if I find that one miracle cure I will let you know!
Thank you Vanessa, but having spent the last two months of my first pregnancy with my leg in plaster after a car accident, knowing the utter chaos it caused, I will politely decline that sweet offer… 😂
Susie, I hope things have quieted down in the past few days. (Just now catching up on all of my Substack reading.) Sending you healing thoughts... to remedy the scarcity of sleep, to relieve the effects of garden work, and to clear your environment. May the mice saunter softly above you.
Oh, and we keep our little eight-legged friends in the corners and say they are preparing our decorations for Halloween. (They also kill mosquitoes once in a while.)
Thank you Louise, the air is clear now, though I shudder to think of the residual effects of such a fire… probably its best not to!
I have handed out tiny slippers to the mice which seems to be working, for the moment anyway and the spiders, well, as you say they may decorate my kitchen (mostly rather beautifully) in place I’d rather they didn’t but they do kill the odd even more unwanted guest!
Hoping the weekend has been a kind one to you xx
Oh, those dear little mice. I can just picture them shuffling about in the attic, all snug in their little slippers. 🐀 Not a creature was stirring.... Well, actually, they were, but you just couldn't hear them!
Oh Susie, insomnia is so horrid and then add to that the acrid air, an the pressure you put on yourself to make it all grand… I want wrap a blanket around you and turn off time so your body can find its rhythm again. My friend just shared this essay she wrote about her insomnia, I think you might find some solidarity in the read/listen.
http://www.healthstorycollaborative.org/blog/2022/4/27/soul-chronicles-standing-watch-in-the-sleepless-sea
Wishing you downy, quiet wings of slumber.
Thank you for the link Kimberly, I have added it to my list to listen to later as I complete the horrifying list of mundanities necessary before classes again on Monday.
Insomnia has crept up on me slowly, as a young woman it was a rare and ultimately forgettable occurrence, as a middle-aged/now-knocking-old-aged woman it feels like I’ve stepped onto unknown path and can’t find my way to the right one. I have tried to find a common denominator, there isn’t one, I have tried eating different foods, cutting out all connectivity an hour before sleeping, windows open, windows closed, I’ve moved my bed, changed pillows, tried yoga… nothing seems to deter those nights of open eyed restlessness that arrive on a whim and wisp unannounced and certainly unwanted…
I am unfortunately my own worst enemy though. Joining hands with insomnia is hyperactivity, I am so aware of a need to stay healthy as I get older, the need to keep moving is now an obsession… so much so I become overtired which has the exact opposing effect I am searching for. I know this, I know eventually it will end too, that the cost will be high… probably the highest possible.
Sadly it is also a product of a difficult life, one that I cannot change… I cling to my quiet moments as if they are a life line and hope at least that that line is strong.
With love sweet soul, heartfelt thanks ♥️xxx
beautifully written - you’re a great memoirist ✨
Thank you James, that means the world to me… 🙏🏽
I think, as someone interested in the lives of others, writing about my own seems fair and honest. It is not always easy, in fact sometimes an almost impossibility - like sharing our soul with the world and not knowing who cares and who doesn’t ever could be plain sailing! 🫣
Beautiful stories as always Susie. I hope you have enjoyed your time together with Rosie. And that your back is good! All the best! Dave x
Warm thanks Dave, I really appreciate you taking the time to read my ramblings here. I’m delighted you enjoy them. My back is ok, if I’m careful… and despite the insomnia and the toxic waste, I had a very lovely weekend with Rosie. Sending hugs xx
I will not scold you for the enormous tasks you pile upon yourself, let others do it for a change, I've tried to no avail...lol! Thank God for Rosie's well timed visit this past weekend considering the disastrous burning of 900 tonnes of lithium batteries and several nights of deprived sleep. She is medicine for your soul, as you are mine. Love n Light always sweet Susie. Sweet dreams!
If only your scoldings worked darling… perhaps the sleeplessness would never happen? I am convinced there is a link between my over/hyper activity and those nights I lay wide awake, my head filled with everything and anything guaranteed to not let my eyes close. I’m going to research some deep breathing exercises (as if I don’t do enough already!😂 but know not that sort…)
Sending love sweet soul, love and light always ♥️xxx
Oh dear, Susie - slightly less pressure on the accelerator seems to be called for! I also don't sleep well if I have overly exerted during the day. And as for those spiders' webs....I just call them my natural art installations 😉🙃
Haha, I love that Lynn, “natural art installations’ 😂I will tell this to my husband the next time there is a cobweb dangling from the beams above our kitchen table!
Yes! Foot off the accelerator… it’s good advice, but how the devil do I do that? How do you do that? When ever I try it feels like I’m playing devils advocate! X
I learned to slow up the hard way - I burned out and got dangerously close to a nervous breakdown. These days I listen to my body; it's very good at communicating if you open up to listening to it. Nothing is more important than your health; you can't function without it. Who wants their epitaph to be 'She had a clean house and a tidy garden'?
Good point Lynn! Time to start listening I think! 😏
Jerry Harvey's young daughter in Abilene Paradox asked "What if God is a mouse"?
That made me smile Bruce… if God is indeed a mouse, he/she needs to pitter-patter less noisily!
Good advice for G_d, mice and we mere mortals!
Gorgeous writing; what prodigious energy - too much 'doing' perhaps causing the insomnia (but so elegantly described - I shall share that paragraph in my restack). And then the generous mention of our musings and gatherings. A thousand thanks. So glad you had Rosie for company during the strangest of weekends. Manmade toxicity ... enough said!
Always such kind words Barrie, thank you so much.
Too much ‘doing’ has been a life long malady, I want to do it all, experience everything life throws in my path… the wonderful curiosities of this world, albeit my small corner, never cease, there is always a little something new and exciting catching my eye which simply can’t be ignored! I need to remember though, ‘curiosity killed the cat’!
I don’t even want to think of the pollution caused by the fire which is still burning, I am praying the wind doesn’t change before it goes out, we were some of the lucky ones!
You’re so very welcome for the shout out, you’re website is beautiful, filled with curiosities! 😂
Oh Susie, you drive yourself so hard! Please take my ‘do as I say, not as I do’ advice and put rest higher up your to do list. Even if it leaves thistles standing. In my experience there is something about physical exhaustion that ridiculously induces insomnia. Makes no sense at all!
I hope you had a lovely time with Rosie nonetheless and find time to rest a little this week. Xx
I am my own worst enemy Vanessa, inherited from my dear Papa, I am incapable of slowing down until I hit the proverbial brick wall. Insomnia does seem to be the result of over exertion, something I find hard to accept, you are quite right when you say this!
Thank you for kind words, I do slow down, sadly only when forced to though… I never learn!
Regardless of the very bizarre weekend though, Rosie and I passed a lovely weekend together… we always do ! X
Oh Susie I'm chronically driven and chronically insomniac too – the two things must be connected, I'm certain - but your post, while inspiringly written and as lively as ever, made me feel exhausted! (Distressed about the lithium, too.) Oh and all gardens worth the name must look like that in winter.
Pleased though that you had Rosie home.
No doubt EVERYONE is giving you sleep cures (I loved the Nabokov quote and that's JUST how it is!), but for sure, I'm better with no screens at all after about 6 (she says at 8pm), some tilleul tea, Arkorelax Flash Sommeil melatonin spray under the tongue at bedtime (from the chemist), and a roll-on of relaxing essential oils.
I also repeat the mantra 'quiet mind, quiet heart' until I'm so bored with it that – on occasion – I actually do fall asleep. On the other hand, if you find a cure, do let me know!
Hugs to you.
I’m trying not to think of the fire, the Lithium poisoning the valley, we have been told there is no danger and yet as I read in, we are advised to wash everything that was left outside… as I said we are outside of the danger zone (Samll mercy) but Lithium…! 😓
Hi Roselle, apologies for the delay in replying, I prefer to not rush replies and as such have to wait for a few moments of liberty to do so. I am also convinced that being driven to permanently ‘do’ is linked to insomnia also.
I truly am my own worst enemy, I simply can’t leave something that needs to be tended to, no matter that I’m already dragging my weary body around. But surely there must be other factors playing their role? I have tried to find a common denominator, there isn’t one, I have tried eating different foods, cutting out all connectivity an hour before sleeping, windows open, windows closed, I’ve moved my bed, changed pillows, tried yoga and meditation (impossible for a Gemini mind) nothing seems to deter those nights of open eyed restlessness that arrive on a whim and wisp unannounced and certainly unwanted…
Thank you for the sleep cures… indeed you’re right, I have tried almost everything. Though not the Arkorelax spray. Which I will order immediately… Aromatherapy oils worked well for a while but I think our bodies grow a certain resistance to them, as mine has to Valerian and Passiflore… havé no fear though, if I find that one miracle cure I will let you know!
With love and once again tired hugs..xx
Perhaps I should pop over and put you in plaster 😆
Thank you Vanessa, but having spent the last two months of my first pregnancy with my leg in plaster after a car accident, knowing the utter chaos it caused, I will politely decline that sweet offer… 😂
Wise advice!
It is indeed though not not for the first time! One day I’ll take it on board!
Very kind words @Susie. Merci 🤩
You’re very welcome Judy ♥️